quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
Randomize
