There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
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