so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
I think a kid would responsible me up
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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