I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
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