There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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