WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
No subtext here. People are naked.
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
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