the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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