What did we do last night that was yellow?
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
Randomize
