Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
