Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
Randomize
