How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
if i died would you start the facebook group?
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
I just woke up to my family in the living room watching our security camera tape of me last night talking to a stop sign in our backyard... How the fuck did I get that in the yard?
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
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