He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
if you didn't cry because you couldn't find me and then pee your bed, your wingman status would totally be revoked for leaving me at that party.
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
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