I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
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