thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
plz talk dirty to me
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
Randomize