sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
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