In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
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