We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize