If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
Randomize
