I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
Do you have feelings for this penis?
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
Randomize
