dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
Randomize
