i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
Randomize
