A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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