i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Randomize
