In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
You know you have crossed to the dark side of marriage when a nap is more important than jacking off
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
Randomize
