i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
Randomize
