STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
This is classic penis vs brain.
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
Randomize
