i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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