woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
