No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Randomize
