Don't you send me to vm
So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
Also I told several people at the bar last night that my dad the alligator wrestler died wrestling an alligator. So if anyone asks that's real.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
Randomize
