super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
Guess who's still drunk but on time to court to represent a DUI?
You are my hero
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize