Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
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