She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
I'm high, watching "Scream" and eating a grilled cheese sandwich off my boobs. I'm not going anywhere
Come on, clusterfuck. Put on a pushup bra and get your fine ass to the bar, or you will be a sad single stoner forever
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
Randomize
