don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
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