Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
My farts woke her up so I pretended to be keep sleeping.
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
Randomize