She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
