East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
I just faked an interview like I fake a fucking orgasm. Wonder if these candidates can tell I'm a tired and hungover recruiter?
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
Randomize
