Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
I'm drunk in f*****g wisconsin and want to kill myself.
If it's any consolation, be grateful that you're not in New Jersey.
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
Randomize
