I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
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