i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
Randomize
