so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
Randomize
