I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
Randomize
