3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
Randomize
