Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
I'm at this poker game and this kid to my left is bragging about all the chicks he hits including a "playboy model" when all of a sudden this 22 guy looks him in the eye and says "ever fuck a 70 woman. The things they can and are willing to do" Next think the whole table is quiet for an hour. That guys my hero...
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
Randomize
