u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Randomize
