so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize
