I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
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