Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
You were trust falling into bushes
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
