ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
I just tried to light a cigarette with a tube of lipstick. If I had stayed in girl scouts maybe I could've made that happen.
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
Randomize
