Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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